Dec 102015
 

2015 was supposed to be my reboot year.

I had it all planned in January: I was going to get my health together, finally get my drawn-out divorce finalized, and have a date for New Year’s Eve.

Well… at least my health has significantly improved.

As for the divorce, there was certainly some progress but obviously not enough.  I’ve explained the situation in private to friends who have inquired but I’m not going to blast details all over this blog.  Suffice to say I want my marriage legally dead, in the worst possible way, but the universe seems set on keeping me in this undateable separated state until I give up out of sheer exasperation.

Which I won’t.  But that brings us to the last point. Continue reading »

Oct 052015
 
About a year after my estranged wife left I decided I’d had enough being miserable by myself.  I wanted to share.

Well, more so stuff like joy, but a sympathetic hug now and then would be nice.

Unfortunately here I am another year later with only a single coffee-shop encounter behind me… and the only thing I’ll say about that one is that you never want to see a 53-year-old man regress to 15.  And I never want to do it again.

According to family and friends I shouldn’t be having trouble.  In theory I should be able to slide right into another relationship.   I’ve tried and failed to verbally explain to friends and family why it’s been so difficult, so let’s see if blogging can get the points across.  And they are legion.

The best way to do this, I think, is describe the unicorn– er, woman I would seek if I were still trying: Continue reading »

Mar 122015
 
I‘ve shared some of my experiences with online dating here and there, and with this post I’ll wrap it up.  Like Peter Jackson with The Hobbit, I’m turning a small, silly thing into an overwrought trilogy and I’m not apologetic.  Okay, a little apologetic but catharsis is its own master it seems.  Even a good vent can follow an orc.

Sorry, arc. Continue reading »

Mar 012015
 
I pounded out a little cathartic bit about my online dating tragicomedy recently, and after a bit more thought and experience realized the failures there aren’t entirely my own. It occurred to me that Match is missing an element critical to any online community.

That is, the community. Continue reading »

Jan 282015
 
I keep running into this term “life hacking” without actually knowing what it’s supposed to mean, but on the surface it sure seems to fit what I’m embarking on this year: a personal reboot.  That includes an overdue divorce.

I haven’t started the actual divorce process yet– been very busy preparing to prepare for it though.  I envy any couples who are able to walk away from each other without any major difficulty.  My adult sons aren’t a factor, but years of accumulated crap has sure become one.  Hopefully the fact that I want free of it all, including our house, will help. Continue reading »

Jan 222015
 
As some of you know, I’m separated from my wife of over two decades and preparing to divorce.  At first I couldn’t even think of getting involved with someone else, but after a year of not seeing or hearing from your ex, well, those inhibitions tend to dissolve.  I really do miss the company of others, especially the fairer sex.

A former coworker and longtime friend recommended I try Match.com, a site she swore had worked for her.  I was leery; I’d seen too many online-instigated romances fizzle or even explode.  But she ultimately convinced me and I created an account. Continue reading »

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